Depression in Stay-at-Home Moms: How to Support Your Partner

Pregnancy, giving birth, and becoming a stay-at-home mom can significantly affect how a woman feels about herself. The new responsibilities often change how women think of themselves, affecting their mood, mental health, and relationships.

The Invisible Load of Stay-at-Home Moms

Being stay-at-home-mom (SAHM) may be quite fulfilling, but it also comes with its share of difficulties. Becoming a mother may change how your spouse feels about her body, how they spend their time, how they plan for the future, and how confident they feel in their relationships.

Your wife may be going through an identity crisis since she may have previously linked her sense of identity to her work and professional success. It could be because she's lost her independence and freedom to put herself first.

At the same time, she may feel guilty and hard on herself for not being a good mother according to her own standards.

Additionally, many women feel overwhelmed by the responsibilities and chores of being a stay-at-home mom. Trying to keep track of everything that has to be done all the time can lead to an invisible load - mental and emotional strain that frequently affects women and mothers.

Even if you assist with cooking, grocery shopping, children's school and activities, and other responsibilities, your spouse may still check in with you to keep track of everything and ensure that things are running smoothly and everyone is taken care of.

And this can be exhausting.

The challenges of being a stay-at-home mom can contribute to low self-esteem, anxiety, depression, and burnout.

Here are some things you can do to support your SAHM partner.

Learn about Postpartum Anxiety and Depression

According to the American Psychological Association, 10 to 15 percent of new moms experience postnatal feelings of sadness, irritability, worry, and apprehension, while 1 in 7 women develops postpartum depression (PPD).

Your partner may lack energy, feel like crying all the time, and experience overwhelming fear, loneliness, and hopelessness. Also, she may feel confused and guilty for feeling this way.

It's normal to feel the "baby blues" because pregnancy and giving birth are both very stressful events. Most of us feel overwhelmed when new and challenging things happen in our lives.

But if your partner's reactions don't go away and are so intense that they get in the way of her daily life and health, she might have a condition called perinatal mood and anxiety disorders (PMADs).

Encourage your partner to talk to her doctor about these worries and offer as much help as possible.

Encourage Her to Set Boundaries

Having the ability to say "no" without giving a reason can help you set healthy limits and avoid unnecessary stress.

Learning to say "no" to excessive tasks or demands may help you both prioritize your time, needs, and general well-being. So, be understanding when your partner turns down your, family members', or friends' requests. Assure her that she won't let anyone down if she takes care of herself.

Practice Mindfulness and Relaxation Together

Mindfulness may help us become more self-aware and, in turn, more effective in overcoming anxiety, burnout, and depression.

So, try meditation, deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, or other stress-reduction and mood-boosting activities. Set a mindfulness routine that works for both of you. For example, develop a morning mindfulness routine to start your day focused and calm.

When you practice mindfulness with your partner, you can pay more attention to each other's needs, make a more profound connection, show more compassion, and learn to accept yourselves fully.

Schedule Regular Date Nights

Having regular date nights with your partner is a great way to stay connected and have fun as a couple. It doesn't have to be extravagant or expensive - think stay-at-home date nights.

Any idea is welcome as long as you prioritize your time together and keep your busy schedules from getting in the way. On dates, it's essential to show your spouse that she is your priority. So, make it all about each other, whether it's a night out at a fine restaurant or a wine-tasting night at home.

Seek Couples Counseling

But how can you support your partner when you yourself need support? Counseling for couples might be a great answer.

The invisible load of motherhood can be a discouraging and alienating experience if you don't recognize it and discuss it with your spouse on time.

A marriage counselor may assist you in identifying the problems and overcoming disconnection, loss of intimacy, and feelings of isolation and loneliness.

Couples therapy may be a safe place for you and your spouse to reconnect and get back on track so that you both feel comfortable, loved, seen, and heard by one another.

To find out more about our services, click here: women’s counseling.